Life seemed so perfect for Sari and Daniel Edber before July 20, 2006, when their first child, Jacob Rafael Edber was stillborn.
They left the hospital with empty arms and broken hearts and their healing journey in the “real world” began immediately. They had a lot of unconditional love and empathy from some family and friends (and, not so much from others); but the real support stemmed from new relationships with other bereaved parents who truly knew the grief that accompanies the death of a child.
They found the MISS Foundation and immediately became involved. Sari and Daniel began attending its local support group regularly, they used the online bereavement resources (especially the forum boards), and they started doing “Kindness Projects” in Jacob’s memory.
Sari was one of three stillbirth mothers who sponsored and helped to pass the California MISSing Angel’s Bill. After almost a year of lobbying for this bill, it was signed into law in October, 2007. This was one of her ways of being Jacob’s mom; by making sure that his memory is always honored and by ensuring that his birth received the recognition that it deserves.
Now, Sari has begun her facilitating and advocacy work with the goals of: sharing her experience, being a peer resource for other bereaved parents, and increasing public awareness, education, and research about stillbirth.
Sari and Daniel’s healing revolves around finding ways to keep Jacob’s memory alive and their comfort comes from knowing that Jacob is forever a part of their family. They have been blessed with two subsequent healthy children – a daughter, Talia Jaclyn, born on November 4, 2007 and their second son, Elan Jared, born on Sept. 21, 2010. They are true blessings and will grow up knowing about, remembering, and honoring their big brother, Jacob.
Jacob gave Sari the most wonderful gift imaginable, by making her a mother. He taught her about gratitude, appreciation, values, priorities, love, compassion, relationships, and healing. Most of all, he helped Sari become an even better mother, wife, daughter, sister, and friend. She will never look at the world in the same way, and somehow, through all of her grief, she has learned to be thankful for this new set of eyes.
Sari can be found on the forum boards (under the screen name babyjacob).